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Fight back against Bullies
So can watching kids who treat others fairly and with respect. The good news is that kids who are bullies can learn to change their behavior. Some kids who bully realize that they don’t get the respect they want by threatening others. Get a buddy (and be a buddy). But if you can take a different route and avoid him or her, do so. Don’t bully back. Stand tall and you’ll send the message: “Don’t mess with me.” It’s easier to feel brave when you feel good about yourself. See the next tip! If you can, try your best to ignore the bully’s threats. If you are being bullied, it’s very important to tell an adult. Make a plan to walk with a friend or two on the way to school or recess or lunch or wherever you think you might meet the bully. Or maybe you feel you look best when you shower in the morning before school. Some bullies come from families where everyone is angry and shouting all the time. Kids also can stand up for each other by telling a bully to stop teasing or scaring someone else, and then walk away together. Everyone has the right to feel safe, and being bullied makes people feel unsafe. What Happens to Bullies? How can you stop yourself from getting angry or showing you’re upset? When they pick on someone else, it can make them feel big and powerful. Bullying can make kids not want to play outside or go to school. Maybe you’d like to be more fit. Try distracting yourself (counting backwards from 100, spelling the word ‘turtle’ backwards, etc.) to keep your mind occupied until you are out of the situation and somewhere safe where you can show your feelings. You’re also likely to get in trouble. Some bullies threaten people or try to make them do things they don’t want to do. Offer to do the same if a friend is having bully trouble. Finally, Brian got caught threatening Luis and they were both sent to the school counselor. Fighting back just satisfies a bully and it’s dangerous, too, because someone could get hurt. Finally Gemma made friends at her local swimming pool with a girl who wished she had red hair like Gemma’s. He said that if Luis ever told anyone he would beat him up in front of all the other kids in his class. Some bullies turn into great kids. Gemma told her mom that this one kid was picking on her for having red hair and freckles. Two is better than one if you’re trying to avoid being bullied. Luis lived in fear of Brian — every day he would give his lunch money to Brian but he still beat him up. If you do what a bully says to do, they will likely keep bullying you. Find someone you trust and go and tell them what is happening to you. Bullying Is a Big Deal
Bullying is a big problem that affects lots of kids. Bullies often pick on someone they think they can have power over. If so, maybe you’ll decide to get more exercise, watch less TV, and eat healthier snacks. Over time, Brian learned how to make friends and ask his parents for lunch money. If The Bully Says or Does Something to You
Ignore the bully. Most bullies don’t understand or care about the feelings of others. Teachers, principals, parents, and lunchroom helpers at school can all help to stop bullying. You can’t go into hiding or skip class, of course. Feel good about you. Some have been bullied themselves. They might pick on kids who get upset easily or who have trouble sticking up for themselves. Some bullies are looking for attention. In the end, whether bullies decide to change their ways is up to them. It’s best to stay with others, stay safe, and get help from an adult. If you or someone you know is bothered by a bully, talk to someone you trust. Three-quarters of all kids say they have been bullied or teased. Pretend to feel really brave and confident. Stand tall and be brave. She wanted to be like the other kids but she couldn’t change those things about herself. They may think that being angry, calling names, and pushing people around is a normal way to act. Bullying can make school a place of fear and can lead to more violence and more stress for everyone. Bullies might hit, kick, or push to hurt people, or use words to call names, threaten, tease, or scare them. Sometimes bullies just pick on a kid for no reason at all. If a bully wants you to do something that you don’t want to do — say “no!” and walk away. How does a brave person look and act? Bullying is a big problem. It can make kids feel hurt, scared, sick, lonely, embarrassed and sad. Luis was embarrassed and felt so bad about himself and about school. As much as you can, avoid the bully. In the end, most bullies wind up in trouble. If so, you could decide to get up a little earlier so you can be clean and refreshed for the school day. The two girls became great friends and she learned to ignore the mean girl’s taunts at school. Sometimes bullies stop as soon as a teacher finds out because they’re afraid that they will be punished by parents. But other bullies may not really know how hurtful their actions can be. A bully might say mean things about someone, grab a kid’s stuff, make fun of someone, or leave a kid out of the group on purpose. They may have thought that bullying would make them popular, but they soon find out that other kids just think of them as trouble-making losers. Some kids who bully blame others. Tell an adult. Pretend you don’t hear them and walk away quickly to a place of safety. Don’t hit, kick, or push back to deal with someone bullying you or your friends. The stress of dealing with bullies can make kids feel sick. Tell the bully “No! Then walk away, or run if you have to. They might think bullying is a way to be popular or to get what they want. Being bullied can make kids feel really bad. Our advice falls into two categories: preventing a run-in with the bully, and what to do if you end up face-to-face with the bully. Don’t show your feelings. But every kid has a choice about how to act. Preventing a Run-In With a Bully
Don’t give the bully a chance. Acting as if you don’t notice and don’t care is like giving no reaction at all, and this just might stop a bully’s behavior. Sometimes bullies know that what they are doing or saying hurts other people. Get involved if you see bullying going on in your school — tell an adult, stick up for the kid being bullied, and tell the bully to stop. The power they wanted slips away fast. Bullies tend to bully kids who don’t stick up for themselves. This is not tattling on someone who has done something small — bullying is wrong and it helps if everyone who gets bullied or sees someone being bullied speaks up. When you’re scared of another person, you’re probably not feeling your bravest. Bullies want a big reaction to their teasing and meanness. Tell someone about it and keep telling until something is done. Why Do Bullies Act That Way? Some bullies are copying what they’ve seen someone else do. Luis even cried one day and another girl told everyone that he was a baby and had been crying. Stand up for yourself. Teachers, counselors, and parents can help. Most bullies are trying to make themselves feel more important. Nobody’s perfect, but what can you do to look and feel your best? But no one needs to put up with a bully’s behavior. Some bullies never learn. Luis never wanted to be friends with Brian but he did learn to act strong and more confident around him. But sometimes just acting brave is enough to stop a bully. If they keep acting mean and hurtful, sooner or later they may have only a few friends left — usually other kids who are just like them. Brian got in a lot of trouble at home. Getting a big reaction out of someone can make bullies feel like they have the power they want. Sometimes bullies pick on someone who is smarter than they are or different from them in some way. Bullying bothers everyone — and not just the kids who are getting picked on. Bullying: How to Handle It
So now you know that bullying is a big problem that affects a lot of kids, but what do you do if someone is bullying you? Stop it!” in a loud voice. Other kids move on and leave bullies behind. Bullies can change if they learn to use their power in positive ways. It’s hard to keep your mind on schoolwork when you’re worried about how you’re going to deal with the bully near your locker. Plan ahead.
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